Poppin Bubbles

As days go by and fade to nights

I still question why you left

I wonder how it didn't work out

but now you're gone

and memories all I have for now

but no it's not over

we'll get older we'll get over

we'll live to see the day

that I hope for

come back to me

I still believe that

we'll get it right again

we'll come back to life again

we won't say another goodbye again

you'll live forever with me

someday, someday

we'll be together

someday,

someday

we'll be together

I heard someday

might be today

mysteries of destinies

they are somehow

and are someway

for all we know

they come tomorrow

for today my eyes are open

my arms are raised

for your embrace

my hands are here to mend

what is broken

to feel again

to walk on the face

I believe there is more to life

oh I love you much more than life

and still I believe

I can change your mind

revive what is dying inside

and someday,

someday we'll be together

someday,

someday

we'll be together

someday,

someday

we'll be together

we'll be together

we'll be together

someday

Performed & Produced by John Legend for the movie, "August Rush"



This Song/Post is dedicated to the person I love, Happy Birthday!!

BTW this was a really good movie, it should still be on On Demand

OK, so I wrote this a couple weeks ago and just now got around to publishing... I told you I had alot of stuff on my mind...

This blog has been in my head for the past two weeks, and I am still not sure if I want to put this out in the universe, but here it goes. There are just some things that piss me off when it comes to relationships. I do not claim to be an expert, because God alone knows I have made a lot of mistakes and have had some very disastrous experiences when it comes to the whole love thing. I have however, tried to learn from my experiences and to make a mental list of my likes/dislikes and note the things that happened that I would not like to repeat. And for the most part I have been able to do just that, hence the reason I had not entirely given up on the idea of meeting someone and falling in lots of like, or falling in love, getting married and having a family of my own.

Well last year I met someone… and while I do not expect anyone to be perfect, cause I am by far not perfect myself. There are however some expectations that I have, that I do not think are too unreasonable. I know expressing one’s self comes naturally for some and for others it can bring them to a state of deep anxiety. I used to be in the latter group and had to learn and grow into the person I have become today, one who tries to clearly state my feelings about things, and try not to hurt anyone’s feelings. I try to be honest and sincere and I know that if I do that then there will be less misunderstandings. Well others have yet to grow into themselves and I hate it when there is an air of ambiguity. If you are upset with a person for any reason, it is my opinion (and you may differ) that you should share that with the other person. Trust me, it helps… it helps knowing what went wrong and how to right that wrong. What I can understand, but cannot fathom or condone is the silent treatment. I think it is cowardly…If you are upset with me, tell me…that is the only way I am going to know that you are, and please do me the courtesy of telling me why during the process…Grow a pair!

A pair of what you might ask, but I don’t think I need/have to spell it out, but for those of you who need specificity in life “A Pair of Balls”. A pair of balls, that part of the male genitalia that just hangs around, but gets all up in the mix when the adrenalin rush hits them. Who feels the need to join in the party somewhere in the middle, to make things happen, so to speak. In this male dominated existence that we live in, it is funny, even hilarious, yet commonplace that something that is to be associated with a position of strength and certainty be likened unto a pair of balls. Cowardice is the equivalent of not having a pair of balls. We all know women have strength untold and untapped. Well, that’s just what I felt like telling the person in my life… grow a pair!! And I am sure they would not have appreciated it, just as much as I did not appreciate getting the silent treatment and having to try and figure out why they were upset with me. But I am fairly intuitive so I was able to figure it out on my own, but really is it too much to ask you to talk to me…

Well all this talk about balls, took me back to my college days. I was a very shy person and still find it sometimes hard opening up and sharing myself with people, but I know I have definitely gotten a whole lot better…but when I first started college I found it hard to make friends and by the end of my first year, I had only made two friends of my own (outside of the friends of my sister, who she introduced me to). Well one of those two friends had a saying, “Bite my Balls Bitch!” lol J Looking back I have to laugh at the phrase, but trust me to a shy island girl, they were, well those were fighting words and showed strength and made another person think twice about stepping to you. Loosely I guess it could be also translated to mean “Kiss My Ass!” And not the words that should be coming out the mouth of a young lady, but so much more exciting and enticing, especially when first coming to understand an experiencing road rage. Well I guess my friend did not realize how much I totally enjoyed the phrase and had adopted it into my becoming a little bit more Americanized. Because as we all know, as humans all we really want to do is fit in, to belong and be accepted. Well one day we were at Meijer and this person happened to do something and annoyed me and I blurted it out…lol you could imagine the shock on her face when I said it. You should have seen her face, but she put me in check immediately and I don’t think I have ever said it ever again, but there have been times when I may have been tempted to say it and a whole lot more, just like I could not bring myself to say it loud, and to the person who needs to hear it the most-“Grow A Pair!”

What I have realized though, is that words like time is something you can never take back, and never mind you might be thinking it, feeling, writing about it, once you say it, you have to be able to live with it… and I am not sure I am at that point just yet, the point where I have to live with the consequences…

I am back at it... Well I know for those of you who are close to me, you know I am in a period of transition and despite having tons of time on my hand, I have not had the opportunity (OK who am I kidding) I just haven't felt like blogging, putting myself and my thoughts out there. It still stirs mixed emotions in me when I put my thoughts out there for others to read, for soo many year I have been a very reserved person, usually keeping most of what I am thinking, feeling and experiencing bottled up inside. Somewhere safe, where no one can see. So forgive me, those of you have asked when I was going to be blogging again. Now don't get me wrong, there are a couple things I have written about, which I will share with you soon enough.

So what do I want to talk about today, what do I have on my mind? Well with all this extra time on my hands I have had time to devote to one of my favorite pastimes-reading... I love to read for leisure and find all sorts of books and topics interesting. I have been reading to myself since the age of four, when my parents wanted me to go to sleep, all they had to do was give me a book and soon enough I was off to dreamland... Well having all this free time has given me time to read some books, one of which has inspired me, written by my all time favorite NFL coach Tony Dungy, Quiet Strength, chronicles the life and experiences of the first African American Coach to win the Vince Lombardi trophy. Ironically I finished the book on the same day that Coach Dungy announced his retirement from coaching the Indianapolis Colts. A man of purpose, he overcame and accomplished so much throughout his career and did so with great dignity and integrity. I have always admired Coach Dungy and still to this day cheer for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, the first team he was Head Coach for back in 1996, the year I moved here and was first truly introduced to the game of American Football (yes I still call it that, everyone else in the rest of the world knows that soccer is really football, duh!!). One quote that stood out for me after reading this book and I have been taking with me since then is, "I don't have the strength or wisdom to get through a single day without guidance and grace from God". Believing in a higher power is something that most of us take for granted, but appreciating the fact that without him, our lives would be no more. A man of deep religious conviction, Tony Dungy lived his life as one that a lot of our young men should try to emulate. Whenever you get a chance, whether you like football or not this book was a great book to read, hopefully they will make this book into a movie someday...

One book that I did read a long time ago, as a pre-teen and which left a great impression on my mind as a young person is Gifted Hands: The Ben Carson Story. This book is another book that all young African American children, especially males should read. I have always had the dream of becoming a Clinical Child Psychologist, and I still plan on achieving that goal someday soon, every time I get discouraged I just remember his story...

The inspiring story of Dr. Ben Carson takes readers into the life of an inner-city youngster who rose above his circumstances to become director of pediatric neurosurgery at Johns Hopkins University Hospital. Gifted Hands by Ben Carson, M.D. and Cecil Murphey, which originally released in 1990, is the story of Ben Carson, who overcame seemingly insurmountable odds: a broken home, poverty, limited opportunity, and scholastic and behavioral problems. It chronicles the transformation of an angry inner city boy, growing up in Detroit with a violent temper, into a medical genius renowned for his unique surgical skills, innovative medical procedures, and a mild bedside manner.Carson shares the inspiration behind a strong will to reach his potential in life, both personally and professionally. He says his mother "was the earliest, strongest and most impacting force in my life." He also tells of his faith in God, which guides him through complex and delicate surgeries. "Never get too big for God. Never drop God out of your life," Carson said.

In the Gifted Hands TV Tie-in edition by Gregg Lewis (Zonderkidz, February 2009, ISBN: 978-0-310-71894-9, $5.99), kids will read how Ben Carson was able to accomplish his dream through faith and determination. The special movie tie-in print edition inspires young readers with the story of how an angry inner-city boy grew up to become one of the world's greatest neurosurgeons, showing kids that anything is possible with faith and determination. Many had given up on Ben, including himself, but his mother never did. She encouraged him to do better and reach higher for his dreams. There are photographs of Ben and his family throughout the text, with an 8-page color section of movie and behind-the-scene images.


About the TNT Original Movie GIFTED HANDS: THE BEN CARSON STORY A frustrated young boy with problems in school overcomes the obstacles in his life to become a world-renowned neurosurgeon in this uplifting and inspirational JOHNSON & JOHNSON SPOTLIGHT PRESENTATION® starring Oscar® winner Cuba Gooding Jr. (Jerry Maguire) and two-time NAACP Image Award winner Kimberly Elise (The Great Debaters, The Manchurian Candidate). The movie is based on the true story of Dr. Ben Carson, whose lifelong journey led him to become director of pediatric neurosurgery at Johns Hopkins Children's Center, a best-selling author and a recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom. The movie premieres Feb. 7 at 8 p.m. (ET/PT), exclusively on TNT. Movie photos are available for story inclusion. Please contact Lindsey Rodarmer at (616) 698-3332 or lindsey.rodarmer@zondervan.com. About the Authors Dr. Benjamin Carson is a professor of neurosurgery, plastic surgery, oncology, and pediatrics, and the director of pediatric neurosurgery at Johns Hopkins Medical Institutions. He won a full scholarship to Yale University and is a graduate from the University of Michigan Medical School. He is the author of three other bestselling books--Gifted Hands, Think Big, and The Big Picture. He serves on the corporate boards of the Kellogg Company, Costco Wholesale Corp., and American's Promise, among others, and is an Emeritus Fellow of the Yale Corporation. Carson earned international recognition in 1987 for his part in the landmark separation of the Binder Siamese twins of Germany, who were joined at the back of the head. That procedure and other hemispherectomy operations are described in his book Gifted Hands. Ben, his wife, and three sons live in Maryland. He and his wife, Candy, are the parents of three grown sons and live in Baltimore County, Maryland. For more information, visit www.drbencarson.com.

Now that one of my favorite books is being made into a TV Movie, I am happy that more young people will be exposed to this story and can find yet another role model with a darker pigmentation, (Love you Pres. Obama!) and who said Detroit can't produce great things, never heard this story obviously. I would encourage you all to watch tomorrow at 8pm on TNT, if you can't, well then there is Tivo, you could probably look at it online and if all else fails hey I know some of you still got your old school VHS-tape it! Happy African American History Month !

On a much lighter note, and I did say I have a wide taste in books, another two books have been made into movies, much to my surprise... especially the one that is being released in movie theatres out today, "Confessions of a Shopaholic", by Sophie Kinsella, a book I happened to own up until recently when I donated most of my books to charity during the transition. A funny book about a young woman who is searching for love and who just happens to be a shopaholic, hmmm... I wonder why I was soo attracted to this book, was it the author's name or the title, or maybe both... anyway I did read this book a couple time, so I was surprised to see that it was made into a movie... I will go see it, if not today, as soon as it gets to the dollar show, and then I might wait till a Monday evening when the tickets are 50 cents a piece when you buy four or more tickets at the Universal 16 in Warren. You might wonder why am I being so cheap, especially when I did like the book, but in my experience I never like the movie better than I did reading the book, for example, "Waiting to Exhale", much better as a book, "The Secret Life of Bees", better as a book, "Shopgirl" definitely better as a book... Don't get me wrong I love movies, but there is something to be said for curling up with a good book...

And of course I could not end this blog without talking about next Friday's release of the single woman's other "bible" as a movie, "He's Just Not That In To You". A book which I have not only read, but own the pocket version and have read and re-read as I was trying to navigate the world of dating years ago... I am not doing that anymore... but it is still a good read, if you are single and have not read it as of yet, I definitely recommend. Anyway, with as many big name stars they could find, Jennifer Anniston, Ben Affleck, Ms. ET herself Drew Barrymore, etc. etc. I am not sure if this movie will really have the same impact that the TV Show turned movie sensation (stay tuned pt. 2 might be headed our way soon) Sex And The City, which was the inspiration for the book will make it into a big moneymaker... Usually when we have that many egos, oops my bad, big name stars in a movie, it is usually a flop. Not wishing it bad, but that has happened in the past, so we will see next week...

Anyway I think I have said a whole lot today, more than made up for my silence I think, if not don't worry I won't be gone too long, see ya!

Well it's been a minute since I have had a chance to sit and write, I knew this blog thing was going to work out better than my journal for me, 'cause the level of guilt I feel when I have missed a couple (ok so its more than just a couple) days is not the same. It is not that I have not had some stuff come up that I feel passionately about, it is just that I have not had a moment of quiet to write and just let my thoughts flow, in their natural state... I was going to write about the state of the City and the incinerator issue, but then I thought who cares... and then Spirit Airlines (for anyone who knows me, they know I love flying off some where for a quick trip) decided they were going to come up with a new way to make more money off of us travellers and I wanted to vent about it, but then I forgot about it, when something else took up my thoughts...And then I was on one of my addictions, facebook and a certain person who I was talking to at one point put up a blog full of BS, ok so why am I holding back, forget the acronym, bull shit... and then I was soo mad that I knew I needed to calm down before I decided to write anything. So this blog is dedicated to all three.




Firstly, let me say this, despite what everyone may think I Love Detroit. I feel as if I became the adult that I think that I am, here in this renaissance city. I have always loved history, and Detroit is one of those cities that is so full of stories, told and untold. In the past decade that I have lived here, there have been so many positive changes that have made me come to appreciate it more and more. The re-development of the city is one of those things that has made me proud to be a transplanted Detroiter. However, despite the fact that we have made great strides, we are shooting ourselves in the foot by not keeping up with other major urban cities by incorporating a comprehensive and citywide recycling program, as well as a solution to the problem of housing the largest incinerator this side of the western hemisphere. Now I can say that I was not one who really was an activist growing up or one who was marching against environmental issues... but when you open your eyes and remove the shades you can see what not being good stewards has brought upon us, just look at the way mother nature has been rebelling recently. There has been a surge in the number of hurricanes, earthquakes, fires, storms, tornadoes, and other natural disasters in the past couple years. And I have a funny feeling she is not finished with us yet...





Well back to the issue at hand-One day last week, I woke up to the sweet stink scent of the sore thumb of the citizens of Detroit, the incinerator. Living less than two miles from the incinerator, at different times of the day, varying on the temperatures, I am greeted with a scent soo pungent that your only recourse is to seek refuge inside your home (with the windows closed of course). This incinerator has fumes that you can sometimes smell all the way to the New Center Area, where the Governor's SE MI office just happens to be located. For all the good that the incinerator does by getting rid of the waste matter, not only for the city but also several of the other suburbs, and providing steam energy for alot of the downtown area, it is also harmful for us the residents who live close enough to be affected by it. The contract is up for renewal and our local goernment cannot seem to come to a decision on what should be done. NB- none of them live in close vicinity likeI do or else the answer would be very simple, shut it down.





Now as to Spirit Airlines, that low cost air carrier that I happen to frequent whenever I am trying to escape the city and its lovely scents, has recently decided to carry over more of the rising costs in airline fuel to us passengers by charging us to pick our seats in advance. When I first saw this new tactic I had to LOL, why? Because I being the very savvy traveller that I am was the very person they were targeting. I hate sitting in the middle on any airplane, I happen to prefer sitting by the window, so that I can cover my head and go to sleep in peace. I seem to never have a problem falling asleep on the plane. Anyway, I would always go online purchase my tickets and with the very next click of tohe mouse I would pre-select my seats. I usually get a window seat close to the front, never mind the fact that I may be the last person to board the plane, it means however that I am one of the first persons to exit the plane, and that's what matters the most... especially if you are trying to make it to the nearest restroom before a line ensues. Well it seems like it has all come to an end, if I am going to be sitting at a window on future spirit flights, I will have to pay an additional fee of $15 or just leave it all in the hands of the airplane gods who randomly choose seats for passengers. This practice is also becoming more widespread with other airlines, so passengers beware, they are really trying to get your money.



Lastly, like we would say in our very urban vernacular, I have to put someone on blast for a hot second...Now for fear of libel I will not name names, but a certain young man who I met on facebook(that ever so popular social networking site that I am addicted to), but knew in passing when I attended college, had the nerve to try and pull the okey doke on me. Now, we had recently started conversing on a personal level and I admit I had started to really like this guy. Now when I start dating a person, I feel like there should be full disclosure, so I asked the pertinent questions as it relates to their current relationship status. For example, question #1 Do you have a current girlfriend or are you dating anyone? Are you seeing anyone? Do you have a homie lover friend? A sexual partner, etc, etc. Ok, so I went through my list of question and this person answered in the negative to all of the above and some more. So qw commenced with the getting to know each other part and got to the stage where we were really liking each other. I went out of town on one of my various trips and came back only to find out that this same person had announced on facebook that they were now in a relationship and surprise surprise that person was not me. I had a conversation via email with this person who told me that their current relationship just"inevitably progressed to that point recently" verbatim. In my mind another load of bull shit from someone who purports to be one of the last good guys out there. Not!!! Never mind they were trying to be in a relationship with me... Well I want to share with you a little post from this person's blog, for someone who said and did something else and basically lied to me, this person felt the need to post this:

"I have always been the type to wear my heart on my sleeve; Easily displaying what I think, feel, say and do. I've had alot on my mind lately in terms of the people I'm associating myself with. It seems like the closer I get to be with some people, the further others seem to drift away. The word "friend" is thrown around loosely. People seem to have a casual attitude about who their boys or girls are. I understand that women hang with their girlfriends and fellas hang with their boys and/or girls, and that's all good. But be careful who you call "friend". To me, friendship is about: Honesty, trust, communication and companionship, which is the foundation of a relationship. Friends are those people that talk with you, confide with you in times of need; helping to keep each other's spirits up. That meaning of friendship is sometimes coincided or confused with "Associate". An associate is someone that you know, and occasionally converse and hang out with. The respect is there, but there's no mental, and emotional/spiritual bond that the "friendship" should include. An associate has a more casual, or non-chalant approach. There's a difference there that people fail to realize; The associates are the ones who come a dime a dozen, real friends are blessings from God.

I want to eliminate those who've shown themselves to be "fairweathered friends": Those who say one thing and do another, or here one minute and gone the next. I don't want to further waste my time being affected by stress/frustration, envy or just overall negativity. "B-Real" is not just a nickname for myself, but its also what I expect from those I know and love. I want to know that you're there for/with me and you want me around, or are we just wasting each others time. I know what I'm about, I know when I see something good and I won't settle for anything less. God has many ways to make His presence known, to make us realize/prioritize what and who we need within our lives. People need to put more consideration to their words and actions. Remember- The attention, respect and love you show shall be given in return. If you're considered a real friend of mine; I love you too and God Bless you.Let me know what you guys think of this Note."

Further evidence that NAS-N***as Ain't Sh*t!!! Need I say more, hope you have enjoyed my latest rant...

So, I just felt like I had to share this with the world... I am in the process of trying to lose some weight, in time for my sister's wedding in just over a month, so I have been going to the gym early in the morning (I can't sleep anyway, so might as well get up and make good use of the time). So I went to the gym this morning and got on the treadmill, put my mp3 player on and the fan on myself. I had just started getting into my stride when the only other lone occupant of the gym, came over and got on the other treadmill right next to me and moved the fan so that he could get some of the breeze. He then turns and asks me, "Do you still feel it?" The breeze from the fan i.e. And of course I said yeah, however minute the amount of air was, I just didn't feel the need to bitch about the fact that he hadn't asked prior to moving the fan in the first place.



For privacy sake we will just call him D, D then uses this opportunity to start a conversation with me, and then asks me how I was doing. I answered him quickly and tried to get back to my workout, cause usually I prefer to work out in solitude and my music. He then says to me, "Yeah I noticed how flexible you are..." Flexible??? HMMMM? I wasn't quite sure how to take this comment, but I went ahead and figured that he was giving me some type of workout/sports junkie compliment and not meaning it in a derogatory manner. I said to him, "Oh yeah, really? Well I guess, if you say so..." and then he says, "Yeah really, you know I saw you the other day and you looked real flexible, I thought you might have done gymnastics." Gymnastics??? Have you seen my very overweight behind lately? That would be the day. Well I responded by saying, "Yes I used to be very flexible, I ran track all through high school and I did the long jump and the high jump and javelin." (Yes, my lazy butt used to do all that stuff, Oh what a shame!) "I am trying to get back in shape and that's why I am here." Well we had small talk for another five minutes and then proceeded with our respective workouts.





Now I have been going to this gym for a while and have seen this guy, D, over the years and he never really spoke before, so I was more than a little surprised when he spoke this morning. And it got me to wondering where did he get the notion from that I was very flexible... most recently when I have seen him at the gym I have not been doing any stretches etc. that would show my flexibility in the first place, so I was racking my brain trying to figure what prompted his comment. Could it be that I was being observed all along and was just now being approached.... hmmmm? It figures, instead of the show, "Kids Say the Darnedest Things", they should have had a show called, "Men Say & Do the Darnedest Things"... I took the encouraging words he had to share and went about my day and tried to see how flexible I really was when I started doing my stretches. Believe you me, I was nowhere able to do all the things that I used to do in my old workouts, but I could see how he would/could say that about me.





This incident however, reminded me of another situation where a guy I once knew waited many years before he made a move/made a comment to me about his true feelings. I was in high school and I had a friend who had a friend who used to be very nice to me. He was significantly older and was always looking out for Soapy. In the very small island that I grew up on, you were cool if you had a friend with a car, especially one who was older and male. He would pick me up from school to go get lunch, if he saw myself and my friends on the road walking he would always pick us up and drop us off wherever we needed to go. Now this behavior continued for years, he even helped me when I pulled off the surprise of the century and hosted my adoptive parents' 30th wedding anniversary party. It took him the rest of that year before he called me drunk on Christmas night to tell me that he was in love with me and he was sorry to see me move away and that he had been in love with me the whole time we had known each other. This was right around the time that I had decided to make the move to da D for school and spread my wings. Needless to say, our relationship was never the same after that and I have not spoken to him in about a dozen summers. I know however that if ever the need arose he would be right there looking out for me.



But back to the topic at hand... Do you ever wonder sometimes why people say the things they say. and do the things they do? This has always baffled, sometimes it can be very inappropriate, other times it can be very insightful, and other times you can have a WTF!! moment. Which brings me to something else that has been weighing on my mind and should have its own entire blog of its own, in fact I will save it for later, but why do men say things when they know they don't mean it... or just open their mouths and put their size 13 feet into it all the way back to the oesophagus. It is amazing to me, it makes me wonder whether or not they actually think about what it is they are going to say before they actually say it. Nope. I don't think they actually do, but I'll let you help me figure it out... stay tuned for the next title from Soapy's "soapbox", hehe lol, "soapbox" you get it... yes I know I make corny jokes... and today as always take care of you...

OK, so first let me apologize for the unusually long header/title for this post, it just seemed to be the most appropriate. And secondly it really does not have anything to do with the Sex Text Scandal currently heating up the sound waves here in D-Town, but don't be surprised if it gets mentioned at some point. At this point I shall have to put a small disclaimer in right here,this post is not meant to hurt or harm anyone in particular in any which way or form, if you find that the text mentions people, places and events that might seem relevant to a situation or yourself, please don't let it consume you... It's not about you (or your crew), it's just my observations...

Over the years I have had some very interesting dating experiences, and from time to time as I work through "poppin some bubbles" in my life, you are going to hear about some of them, but for right now we will just concentrate on the present post at hand. 'To Text or Not to Text...', found its place in cyberspace thanks to a very clear reminder that I got yesterday when I received a text and my phone promptly alerted me that I had used up 87% of my allowed text storage. Well this particular text that I received came from someone who I am not so sure I even need/want to/deserves a response. I have not been out on a date in more than a year, so correct me if I am wrong, but don't people still call and ask each other out? Well I was still under that impression about a month ago, until a certain young man invited me out via text... Ding ding ding! That should have been the light bulb right there, going off in my head with the loud noise of an alarm. Anyway, I accept this invitation to go out and then the conversation started about what we were going to do and where we were going to go (all via text), so I was told whatever you decide is fine.

Being the cost effective sista that I am, I found something that I thought might be fun to do and not cost too much. A movie at the DIA, "Honeydripper" with Danny Glover, an excellent movie I might add, and refreshments in the cafe, and then later on to the Erotic Art show and possibly dinner at Berts. Now this was all decided upon two days before the date, at least the first part, which the person said was cool. So now the day of the date arrived and I had not spoken to my date, so I decided to call to confirm, there was no answer, so of course unlike most, I left a message, a very detailed one at that, with all the particulars for the evening. I even did one better, I attempted to use the preferred method of communication 'text' to see if I would get a response... Alas, no luck and it soon became apparent that I was being stood up. Needless to say, I still had a great time at the movie, art show and late night dinner, minus my date, thanks to a couple of married friends who decided they would be my dates...

But the tale does not end there, for we must get to the most recent text message... So, two weeks after being stood up, this person sends me the standard text line that every guy seems to have pre-saved, "What's up? What are you doing tonight?" I was immediately incensed, after standing me up, not returning my phone call, and basically ignoring me for two weeks, this person, decided that they would contact me, via text no less, to make plans for that very night. At the time I was doing some paperwork with a friend, she saw the incredulous look on my face and after explaining the situation to her, she asked "are you going to respond to that?" The answer is yes folks, I did respond...however, I did let that person know in an ever so nice way how I felt about them standing me up and the situation in general, via text of course... claims were made, "oh you never called, I didn't get any msgs. from you, etc, etc..." Surprise, surprise, we have not made it out on a date yet, but didn't I get a text last night, "What's up? What are you up to?" (A slight variation of the standard text line) Amazing, men are amazing, is this a blindspot that they are just not trying to acknowledge as they cruise along dating? Ok dudes, let me break it down for you, texting me shows me how little you think of me, so I am not going to take you seriously if your preferred method of communication is text messaging... it reeks of laziness, (sloth is one of the seven deadly sins) and further proves my hypothesis for my thesis paper that, "the whole video gaming industry has a significant role to play in the diminishing of effective communicative skills among the male population between the ages of 7 thru 45" You might say that texting has absolutely nothing to do with video games, but lets think for a moment, picture in your mind if you will a person who is texting and a person who is playing a video game on whichever gaming system... hmmm? See the similarity, there are non verbal communications taking place here, and lets not forget the uttered expletives when you have just made a mistake or lost a game. Who are they talking to? Themselves? What's the response? I seriously think that the lack of communication skills required for gaming has affected the ability of men to effectively communicate, much less to communicate with someone they are attempting to date.I think that it is in poor taste to try to date someone and only communicate via text. Part of what attracts one person to another is the voice, the tone, the timbre, the accent. At least for me that plays an important part in determining if I want to date person. Barry White was sexy to me, let's see had he been alive today, I wouldn't want him to text me, no Barry, I would need you to call me...

I would love to say that this most recent incident was my first experience, but sadly to say within the last three years I have found this to be very commonplace and I am sure this is not going to be the last... Well I gotta go now, but wait... lol you are not going to believe this, I just got another text...until next time, take care of you!